Charlie Chaplin's Smile.

"The real good comedians, like Chaplin, would make you laugh and a second later, cry."

- Martin Landau.

I remember coming out to Los Angeles and working with my first talent manager, the lovely Joannie Burstein, and she would say to me repeatedly, "Kieren, you are funny! You need to do comedy. As a way to break out. And then -- you can do whatever you want."

And admittedly, I was hooked on drama -- having debuted on Broadway in The Diary of Anne Frank, I had a proclivity for intense stories, the kind that made you cry.

And comedy felt like fluff. 

I needed to be doing something important. This is how I felt. And I kind of fought against Joannie and all who saw me as a funny girl.

And then, a few years ago, I was Lulu's producing partner at Little Bird Theater Company. And I decided to do a play that seemed quirky and hilarious and awkward and heartbreaking and charming.

But at the time that I decided to do it, I just remember thinking, I can do this. This language feels right to me. This feels natural.

But inside I felt like this play was just me. No one else could really relate, I thought. It's a Kieren thing. But -- what I have learned time and time again is that if you feel something deeply and you have the courage to bring it to life -- because all of us need to courage to share of ourselves. To bare ourselves. -- then the irony is that what felt like your thing, it becomes everyone's thing.

And it did.

My play -- it became everyone's play. And I've never gotten more extraordinary feedback or opportunities in my life. As I did from this play. Which I chose. And cast. And found the director for. And produced.

Talk about empowering...

And I know as I write this, that play was only the beginning.

I am SO stoked for Little Beast Theater Company. And for more opportunities for all of my friends, for all of us. 

Yesterday, when I signed with William Morris Endeavor Entertainment for Voice-Over, my agent -- the ever lovely Erik Seastrand -- he asked me when my next show was because he was already wanting to go!!! 

Our next meeting is to read my movie, which Bekah has just finished the first draft!!! I shall read it with my friends.

Anyway... lovely things are abounding.

I fired my commercial agent last week.

And next week -- I have my first Voice Over audition at WMEE and I am meeting with a new commercial agent. And I am meeting with an amaaaaaaaazing talent manager -- everyone to whom I've mentioned her has glowed about her!!!

What a week ahead.

And the reason I am sharing my blog about comedy tonight is because really loving who I am -- my humor -- which is what makes me shine -- has opened every door for me as of late.

And honestly, I love accents and character and I am indeed thrilled to play multitudes of parts. And if making people smile and laugh will get me there -- will light up the world, if this is why I am here, then I ma grateful. Eternally.

And I wear this "comedic crown" with the pride of Michael Jackson when he moonwalked for the very first time.

And in my own way, I shall moonwalk into those 3 meetings next week. And show them all why I came to this town, what makes me unique, and why I am a star.

I am feeling it, my little blades... And I want all of you to feel it too.

Because the more we embrace ourselves, the more we give others permission to embrace themselves. And I believe that we are all here for the others who are walking behind us. Not just for ourselves. But -- so that we may light the way.

Charlie Chaplin did it for all of us.

And this morning when I was tutoring dear Nicholas, he told me about Peter Lopez, a family friend who committed suicide Friday morning. His parents were at their house in Encino, comforting the family. 

And he was Michael Jackson's attorney in recent years, The Eagles attorney, Michael Bubles attorney. He left behind two young teenage girls and a beautiful, adoring wife.

And now he is gone.

And Nicholas found himself attempting to comfort these two young girls on Friday. And they were weeping and asking him how their Daddy could do this, why he would want to go. He dropped them off at school and he was gone by 11:30am.

The housekeeper remembered how he kept running his hands through his hair. Over and over again. In the recent weeks.

Then, the oils spill.

All the suffering.

My point? The world needs to laugh. We all need a reason to wake up and greet the day, something to soothe us as we drift asleep...

And if I can be a part of that, if I have something to give in this area -- then, you know what? I am going to smear it, my comedy, across the whole world. In an attempt to make as many people smile as possible. Make them laugh. Give them relief. Give them love.

I've always wanted to move people. And now I am seeing how.

Since I was a little girl, I dreamed of this. Of doing what I am now starting to do. Again. And part two -- is sooo much sweeter.

What a second act.

The timing is perfect. As it always is. Even when we feel frustrated and annoyed and victim-y, the timing is always divine.

And Chaplin knew this, smile though your heart is aching, smile even though it's breaking. When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by. If you smile through your fear and sorrow. Smile and maybe tomorrow, you'll see the sun come shining through for you...

And thus, I dedicate this blog to Charlie Chaplin, a courageous comedian. And to Michael Jackson, my favourite entertainer of all time. And to the family of Peter Lopez -- that they may be comforted somehow, some way by this song. That they -- and all of you and all of your friends and family who may be hurting, will smile. Again.


Love... Always.